So today is the day?

I guess today is the day... it is some sort of day, at that.


Its been icily raining all day, creating a thick coat of clear frozenness on everything outside. Rather beautiful. But you have to remember that beauty can break you, sometimes it can be just too much.




Today I was, as I said, on the war-path. I had several discussions with my absentee supervisor, and his bff, the lead teacher of our so-called school. I mean to make some changes... I just wish that freakin red tape would stop getting in the way.

What I have decided is wrong with our school is that no one is willing to admit that they have made mistakes. They were honest mistakes, made with good intentions... but now that we have seen those decisions play out, and things have gone awry, no one is willing to admit it! Basically, everyone just tries to cover it up, or find a quick fix, or add more poor decisions on top of it.

Its CRAP.

If you make a mistake, own up. Then do what you can to make it better. Everyone will be better for it. Dont just fumble around trying to put band-aids on a gaping wound.

But apparently, that is what my school likes to do.

Here we have a rather dire situation in the science dept. Two of our teachers are very overwhelmed and our students are NOT being serviced. They are getting a sub-par education.... all in the name of giving them choice. Well, if we give them the choice to take this loser class or another one, well, they still do not learn much of anything. I think at some point (failure) you have to say ya know what, we tried giving you freedom, and you couldnt step up to the plate, so now we get to choose.

But no, why would that happen?

I freakin HATE how everything in my school is supposed to be done for the kids and in the name of the kids and stuff... but its not. It just simply is not.


Look, I will put it out there that my job is cushy. And you know what that is? It is because NO ONE looks over my shoulder to make sure the kids are getting a good education. No one checks up on me EVER... that is evidenced by the fact that I can leave work and no one notices.

Granted, I like this freedom, and I am the type of person who will use the freedom to do an even better job... I own up to myself, and I am my own worst critic...

But other people are totally falling short. And the kids are losing. It is no wonder my school is so close to government take over.... its because there is little cohesiveness, and decisions are really made based on occums razor. Sure, Occum was right about a heck of a lot... but nothing is simple when it comes to kids. They are complex, and so is education... so doing the easiest thing is NOT necessarily doing the right thing... and I do not feel like we are doing the right things now.

I am so frustrated.


And I am not alone.

What is going to happen? How can I just swallow the fact that the kids are getting screwed and keep on keeping on? I dont think I can. Ultimately, I know I cannot stay at a school which is against my own philosophy, even if it is cushy and allows me complete freedom to do what I want. So do I stay and try to make changes? Do I stay and try to come to terms with the fact that no one will ever be completely satisfied with their job? Do I go? Where would I go? Would the same thing happen? How much can I accept, how much is too much?



Wish I could vent more.