Blahidays
Okay, not really. Christmas is not that blah. This month (like, magically, all months this year) has gone really quickly so far.
Jon and I have a ton of shopping left to do and we have realized our first marriage truth: shopping together is BAD for our marriage.
This ultimately stems from two things, the first of which being that we both pretty much despise the malls. The halogen lights, the commercialism, the teeny boppers, the 12 yr old girls who are dressing like they are 20, the 20 yr old boys acting like they are 12... all very valid reasons for hating the mall. Secondly, we shop completely differently.
The perfect example would be tonight. We had a list of people to shop for and some ideas, but really, we both needed some browsing.
This is how I work:
I get an idea or a concept for someone, and I find the store I need to get it in or browse further in. While walking to the store, I look for other stores that might fit someone else. If that does not work out, I go into my intended store, get what I am going to get for the person, and also keep my eyes open for anything that strikes me for anyone on the rest of my list. Usually, the act of doing this gives me another conceptual idea, and I proceed thusly. I continue in this way until I am finished or I at least know where I need to go. So, tonight, I had a list of basically 8 people. One, I am completely at a loss for. (Sorry, Josh) Everyone else worked out pretty okay.
Here is how Jon works:
He chooses one person on his list and starts walking. He ends up in department stores that have a lot of variety, hoping that he sees something that hits him for that one person. He does not really think much about the other people on his list, but when he does, it distracts him from focusing on the person he first chose. The result is that tonight, he had 4 people to buy for. He got one gift. It was a really good one (lucky you, Christian)... but that still leaves 3 major people to buy for.
As you can see, our styles work completely differently. I get INSANELY frustrated that he does not just see stuff and go oh, that will be great, like I do. And he gets frustrated that I want to continually keep speed walking through the mall. We bicker. We get tense. Generally, it is very unpleasant.
So tonight was good - we split up and shopped out own way. I have to admit I moderately stressed that he did not find these other things because they sort of count for me too. But really, the only tension we had to deal with was our anger over being at the stupid mall. Hopefully a good nights sleep will help.
Jon and I have a ton of shopping left to do and we have realized our first marriage truth: shopping together is BAD for our marriage.
This ultimately stems from two things, the first of which being that we both pretty much despise the malls. The halogen lights, the commercialism, the teeny boppers, the 12 yr old girls who are dressing like they are 20, the 20 yr old boys acting like they are 12... all very valid reasons for hating the mall. Secondly, we shop completely differently.
The perfect example would be tonight. We had a list of people to shop for and some ideas, but really, we both needed some browsing.
This is how I work:
I get an idea or a concept for someone, and I find the store I need to get it in or browse further in. While walking to the store, I look for other stores that might fit someone else. If that does not work out, I go into my intended store, get what I am going to get for the person, and also keep my eyes open for anything that strikes me for anyone on the rest of my list. Usually, the act of doing this gives me another conceptual idea, and I proceed thusly. I continue in this way until I am finished or I at least know where I need to go. So, tonight, I had a list of basically 8 people. One, I am completely at a loss for. (Sorry, Josh) Everyone else worked out pretty okay.
Here is how Jon works:
He chooses one person on his list and starts walking. He ends up in department stores that have a lot of variety, hoping that he sees something that hits him for that one person. He does not really think much about the other people on his list, but when he does, it distracts him from focusing on the person he first chose. The result is that tonight, he had 4 people to buy for. He got one gift. It was a really good one (lucky you, Christian)... but that still leaves 3 major people to buy for.
As you can see, our styles work completely differently. I get INSANELY frustrated that he does not just see stuff and go oh, that will be great, like I do. And he gets frustrated that I want to continually keep speed walking through the mall. We bicker. We get tense. Generally, it is very unpleasant.
So tonight was good - we split up and shopped out own way. I have to admit I moderately stressed that he did not find these other things because they sort of count for me too. But really, the only tension we had to deal with was our anger over being at the stupid mall. Hopefully a good nights sleep will help.
posted by FireWithin at 11:18 PM
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