the lil angels

Maybe God is happy that I have been going to Bible study because my kids have been angels this week. Monday and Tuesday were a blessing, making the frustration of the past few months almost worth it.


almost.


For the first time ever, my kids are quiet when I ask them to be. They work when I give them work. They actually DO what they are supposed to do. I do not know if its the sense of inpending DOOM that awaits them next Thursday and Friday or what... SLC conferences are next week. I get to sit for 15 minutes with student and parents and chat with them about how their kid is a jerk in my class. It should be a blast. I have not really had any experiences with parents, and I am sort of expecting to see a lot of them. Quite a few kids are failing my class, so I hope to see their parents. A lot of kids also really like me (dont ask me why, I am so mean to them) and have said that they only want their parents to come see me because they like my class. Go fig. I make them clean the benches.

Anyway, they were wonderful on Monday and Tuesday and I was blown away.

Today, however, was a different story.

Today is something they call "end of quarter celebrations". All of the good kids who are getting >73 in all of their classes (on a side note, what a dork I am for not just saying greater than) get to go on a field trip... while all the BAD kids stay behind.

There are a number of reasons this is stupid:

1. lets put all the bad kids together in groups!!!!
2. lets punish them by making them do work.... why would we EVER want them to associate schoolwork as a BAD thing?!?!?! we want them to like it and DO it.
3. lets send half the teachers out and leave half to take care of things
4. lets put the people who influence each other together!!!
5. And the best of all... lets do a lab for science that uses MATCHES. Lets put fire in the hands of America's future inmates. lovely.

Okay, so they really arent that bad... but it was a LONG freakin day.

and in other news....

Ethan comes home tomorrow!!!!!

picture update

Well, I updated the pictures... I put on an album of Jo and Sals wedding and an album of "October fun-ness" from last night.

Last night was great, thank you for those that made it. The carving was a blast, and I appreciate you all indulging my need to scoop pumpkin guts out. Here is who ended up making it: me, Leslie, Jon, Jenn, Aaron, Paige, Brian, Lauren, Dave, Justin, Bree, Colleen (and baby! congrats!!!). Apologies go out to Jon and Aaron for me just assuming we could come over there. Thank you guys!

Anyway, today is going to be a ton of grading and cleaning my room... so I guess I will just leave it at that. I love you guys.

what the...?

Please explain how this happens: give a 9th grader a test. She gest a 28/80, which is a 23%. This is unacceptable. Give them the opportunity to TAKE THE TEST HOME, use notes, ask parents, use books, whatever to do it... then I will average the results. Get the test back today, 4 WEEKS freakin later..... what does she get?







Oh this is good....








30/80. what the.....? how the bleep do you take a test home for 4 weeks, are able to use books and notes and parents to answer the questions, and BARELY do better than the first time around? what the freakin heck? this makes no sense.





In other mind-boggling news of the day, the hospital scheduled me to work this saturday. Ethan has advised me to tell them to sit on their thumbs and rotate. And while I will most certainly not say that, I will tell them im not working. I am supposed to work one weekend a month, thats IT, and I worked 2 weeks ago. so. BITE ME I am not working.





Send your prayers out to Ethan, hopefully he wont get washed away by Hurricane Wilma. My relatives have mostly evacuated Ft. Myers and went to Sarasota and Bradenton, but there still could be a lot of damage to their homes, depending on how this hurricane shapes up. We shall see.



As far as other news goes... today was okay. Last day I was accepting work for this marking period. Its a relief. I have a few more grades to put in, and then I am done for now. Tomorrow I am going to the opera during a much needed mental health day. Nothing can sweep you away like music... especially music in another language that takes all of your concentration to read the subtitles and watch the stage at the same time. Its a Verdi opera, A Masked Ball. I cant wait. Get me out of here.

Bible study on Tuesday was good.... the study is on covenants and this one focused on the one between David (of David and Goliath fame) and Jonathan (king Saul's son). It was interesting and unfortunately the ladies were having some difficulty with the abstractness of it all. To me it seems obvious, and I guess its just because of my innocence and lack of knowledge that I would think so. I had a great time with "Mrs. Ethan", as my mom would say, and I made her laugh the whole time with amusing anecdotes about my children. I am sure she would laugh about my darling little 9th grader. sigh. I love her to death, but sheesh, child!

I think i am in the mood for some chubby hubby... ugh, im starting to put on weight I think. Its probably a good thing, cuz its freakin COLD in my room at school and I need some insulation. yup yup.






iceeeee creeeeeeaaaaaaaam.

free

Well, its the weekend. I find myself having free time, which is utterly amazing... last weekend I worked, the weekend before I was in Florida for my aunts wedding, and the weekend before that, I worked... so its been a beautiful beautiful Sat. The sun is even out, after a week of gray and rain.

I wanted to throw this in here....

Just cuz its quite possibly one of the cutest pictures I have ever seen of Ethan and I. It was taken at my aunts wedding, we were dancing, naturally. My cousins remarked on how cute we were on the dance floor... working our way up to "fast" music... I think we are pretty good with the slow music, though I HATE to follow, as Josh can attest to. But Ethan, being mr. kinesthetic, was making out just fine and I look forward to future dance practice. :)

Last night me, Lauren, Dave, and Jon crashed Josh's house. Josh saw Fraggle Rock for the first time ever, which was amusing given how perfectly the show fits him. We then played a forever long game of Munchkin. Its funny to think that my 10th graders were probably out partying last night while I am sitting around playing cards with my friends. They do not know what they are missing!

This week was terribly long. On Tuesday it felt like Thursday, and I got so frustrated with my kids earlier in the week that I flipped on them. I am never MEAN, persay, but they know when im pissed, and I kind of jokingly flip on them. It was a busy busy week... I got like 7 hours of sleep a night, but for Thursday, when someone kept me up on my phone forever. Not that I minded or would ever turn away someone who wanted to talk. Anyway, I was frustrated with the youngins, but I do love them so much more than they will ever fully appreciate.

So this morning I actually slept in til 11, which was glorious, and then my bro and I went out to run a few errands... ive been doing laundry and stuff, and now I think I am going to take a shower. My boy is in Ohio this weekend, if you care to check his blog... Someone quit from my school this week, and ive been jealous because I would love to quit and move and be with him.

But the good news is that both Chris and I bought powerball tickets for tonight... 300 mil, I will send you a post card when we win. :)

a few hours left

working again. no big suprise here. Its unseasonably quiet, which I appreciate. Its raining outside pretty heavily, which I also appreciate. Sick people seem to decide perhaps they are not so sick that they need to go to the hospital if it means venturing out in the rain.

I am listening to my treasured ipod... what a wonderful gift, who knew it would be so awesome? Even more awesome is my brother setting it up for me. Anyway, I would like to write down some lyrics, im listening to the song now and it feels appropriate to how I am feeling on this rainy night...


Look at me
I'm as helpless as a kitten up a tree
And I feel like I am clinging to a cloud
I can't understand, I get misty
Just holding your hand

Walk my way
And a thousand violins begin to play
Or it might be the sound of your hello
That music I hear
I get misty the moment you're near

Can't you see that you're leading me on
And it's just what I want you to do
Don't you notice
How hopelessly I'm lost
Thats why I'm following you

On my own
When I wander through this wonderland alone
Never knowing my right foot from my left
My hat from my glove
I'm too misty
And too much in love

Too misty
And too much
In love



I dont know if the lyrics particularly fit me... I mean, im pretty in love... you just have the hear the music. Its called Misty, by Ella Fitzgerald, if you didnt already know. Its mostly the music that fits the way I am feeling... classic old piano bar on a dark rainy night when you are feeling a little bit lonely, a bit hopeful, and very calm. I do love the lyrics... but its the music and the way she is singing it that suit me right now. Its just an amazing song.



guess I will go eat dinner. mmm wheaties.

ventilation

Keep your friends close, and your enemies closer...

words to live by in the educational field.

Much to my dismay, the curriculum coordinator for my school decided to email my principal and tell her that I "act like I know everything there is to know about teaching".

Did she really mistake my boredom for pride or egotism? come ON!

I dont pretend to know anything about teaching. Every single day is a new day, and I never know what I am going to be up against. I beg, borrow, and steal as much as I can from every teacher around me because I know that they are way better than I am. In fact, every time someone tries to compliment me in any way regarding my teaching, I vehemently deny it. How could someone say something like that?!

So THEN I get pulled into a half hour chat with my principal... she reads the emails to me, and I am utterly shocked by what they said... and for a number of reasons... the cc never gave me the impression that she was upset with me or angry with me. she said my pacing was fine, but I need to pick it up a little... but let me remind you

ITS MY FIRST YEAR TEACHING!!!!!!!! I AM TEACHING 3 FREAKING SUBJECTS!!!!!!!

Not only that, but...

EVERY TIME I TURN AROUND, THIS SCHOOL IS MAKING ME DO BUSY WORK FOR THEM!!!!!!!!

excuse me if I am a little behind. Maybe thats because I already spend nearly every waking moment thinking about my kids and doing the stupid paper work that the school makes me do. grrrr! I want to bite her!!!!

Overall, its ridiculous. I am doing the best that I can with what I have been given. And ive been pretty stinkin shafted.


I think the worst part of it all has been my inability to play the game. I know this game. I know how the manipulation and two-facedness of it all works. I can DO that. I am GOOD at doing that... but its such bs, and I simply dont want to pretend to be something I am not. I am trying to be positive, for both myself, and for my kids. I can honestly say that I love those kids and that I care about them and that I want to teach them well... but geez, you wanna know what I think about some of your programs? THEY DONT WORK FOR HIGH SCHOOLERS!!!! Get a freakin CLUE. Dont treat them like babies. Sigh.

I think the reason that this school has such a high turn around is because you either buy into it, or you dont. And most people dont. When a teacher comes up to me and says a kid is smart... they are at the 50% level... thats NOT smart to me. Thats average. When a teacher says oh, this kid came back and said that they have been having success in college... its COMMUNITY COLLEGE. Not to slam community college, but im sorry, I expect WAY more from my kids. My kids are capable of a much more rigorous curriculum and future schooling... so I want to treat them that way. I want to challenge them... but I need to make them buy into me first. I need to make them love me first so that when I start really pushing, they are willing to keep up because they are on my side.

I might not know anything about teaching, but I know a lot about people. And the coordinator can bite me. I would LOVE to see her teach one of my classes. I really truely would. Maybe I will invite her down to do that. Id like that a lot, in fact. I dont want her to fail, of course , but i think it would show her hey, my kids are fabulous, but they need to go a little slower. You know, they want us to make it thru the whole book.... AND teach them how to write... AND teach them how to journal... AND teach them how to read.... AND teach them how to respect themselves and one another... AND teach them how to learn independently... AND teach them how to think critically... and oh yeah, teach them some science in there when you have the time.


I realize that admin is doing their job... but let me do mine! That is all I am asking! Let me do my work! Let me do what I do well, and that is teach. Let me use the time to observe other teachers... let me use the time to create fabulous lesson plans and labs.... dont make me spend THREE HOURS learning how to TAKE NOTES. ARG.









AND GRRR.


there are just not words to explain my frustration. Florida sounds nice. If it werent for those stinkin kids, I would totally go. Yarness.

head butting rebuttal

I am not exactly sure what started the head butting between Ethan and myself... other than to say that I started it... and I think that one of Ethan's recent entries deserves a rebuttal and a proper telling of the story.

Obviously, I would never resort to violence without a reason... :) and so most often when I head butt Ethan its because he is picking on me or mocking me in some way. Or because his forehead is just so close to mine that I cant help it. Truely, I cant remember which occassion caused the head butting at the wedding... but it was hilarious. Hows that go? Note to self: do not head butt in public.

Anyway, we are both dressed up and standing on the deck overlooking the ocean and the seats that were out for the wedding party... Ethan was most likely mocking me. So I head butted him. The DJ stopped and his jaw absolutely dropped. The expression on his face read "She did NOT just do that". I think he did not quite know what to say. I busted up laughing, as did Ethan. And he said (as Ethan recalled) She may be beautiful, but you got to watch out for her. mwa ha ha. And then he offered to help Ethan out. E declined. Regardless, it was hilarious, and just thinking about it makes me laugh. There are so many little things that couples do in private that you do not really think about... and then someone else sees it and you suddenly remember how ridiculous it is.

So I suppose thats not quite a rebuttal, but for the fact that Ethan was probably mocking me or threatening to hit me at the time for whatever reason. (And no, he doesnt beat me, thought im sure he would like to try some day)


Thus endeth my tale.

back at it again

Well, after a nearly a week away from school, I am back. I spent 4 useless days in Tampa, Florida, for a stupid teacher academy training which I really shouldnt get started dissing because I will end up on a 30 minute rant again.

I think my kids missed me... at any rate, they seemed excited to have me back. It sounds like things went okay with the sub, although they tested her patience. Alas, it was to no avail, because all she did was READ HARRY POTTER. Not that I am against Harry Potter... But if you are getting paid to babysit my kids, WATCH them, dont just sit there. It almost makes me laugh cuz when I babysat when I was younger, I was totally the type of babysitter who put on a movie and told them to watch it while I read or zoned out. Ha. Amazing how we can want one thing for our kids but do another thing for someone elses.

So I got back to school today and got quite a few compliments on my pants... they are wool and I recently purchased them during a trip to the outlets with my mom. Go Banana Republic Outlet! :) Anyways, yeah, I think my kids missed me and it was somewhat gratifying that they wouldnt shut up for the sub... occassionally they shut up for me, which makes me feel like I am doing perhaps a slight better job than I originally thought. Then again, maybe not... cuz they still never shut up.

I asked my kids what I missed while I was gone... the 7th graders took all the money collected for Hurricane Katrina relief and dumped it down the toilet. One of MY students (a girl) got into a fist fight with another student (a girl).... both got out of school suspension because this occured during lunch. As my students said, "There was weave flying everywhere! People kept picking pieces up for souveniers."


Um.


EW.


So yeah, apparently things were interesting while we are gone, and its nice to know that the teachers who left are actually an integral part of the school and things go slightly more insane when we are not around. It makes me feel good.

Today I was actually a decent teacher too... we are doing the Metric System. That joy of joys. And so far they have done well with it, despite being notoriously idiotic with math. They are gettingi t so far. We will see how tomorrow goes... we are doing 2 labs in 1 day... im not sure if they can pull it off, but they might suprise me.

In the meantime, here is my schedule for the week...
Tuesday ~ teach all day, come home, hopefully go to bible study with Ethans mom
Wednesday ~ teach all day, go into Philly to the Franklin Institute to preview Body Worlds, an AWESOME exhibit there, for FREE because I TEACH which is AWESOME!!!!!!! :)
Thursday ~ teach all day, maybe go visit the Winners Circle at night bc my bro runs the Quizzo there, so my friends and I ought to start patronizing :)
Friday ~ teach a HALF DAY, then do professional developement for half a day... hopefully, instead, I will be planning what to do NEXT week, since I have no idea, and basically no time to figure it out until then. :)
Sat ~ wake up at 8, because I always wake up at 8... do whatever, probably grade adn work on stuff for next week, then work from 3 to 11
Sunday ~ do the same exact thing as Sat
Monday ~ go to work... again.


All this being said... its been a long week and its only Monday. And my water for spagetti is boiling away.



congrats to aunt jo and sal for getting married on Sat!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :) It was wonderful to see, and im super glad that E and I could make it.



By the way, have I mentioned how much it sucks that Ethan lives in Orlando now? Well it does... but he has his first day today, and from talking to him, it seems to have gone pretty well and he is excited. He knows hes goign to be doing things wrong for awhile... the learning curve is steep, but I have faith in him... hes an intelligent man and I am excited for him. If you think about it, send some prayers his way! :)